God promises that one day we will be free from pain, fear, hurt; there will be no tears in heaven.
Rev 21:4
He will wipe away ever tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away
The FIRST things have passed away. First. First.
First: Coming before all others in time or order. Never previously done
God allowed these things....FIRST. Before heaven, these things had to be, had to exist, they had to come first. I've heard many people say, "Why did God make us suffer? Why would He do this to me/us?"
Appreciation. Thankfulness. Trust. Courage. Hope. Strength. Patience. Love.
These are only a few reasons why God allowed/allows suffering. We are so hurt that we assume he does it for other reasons:
Hatred. Punishment. Neglect. Disappointment. Force. Revenge. Karma.
We have the right to decide what we truly believe about suffering. He allows us to make a choice about it. He has given us all the promises, truths, and love He can through His word. There is nothing more He can say or show us.
Pain has many forms, but most importantly, it hurts, it hurts like HELL. God allows suffering. God allows us to see suffering. God allows hell. God allows us to see hell. Why would he do that? Because he hates us, wants to punish us, wants to force us, wants to get revenge, is neglecting us, or because we deserved it? GOD ALLOWS US TO SEE HELL. HE ALLOWS HELL. It clearly does not say, God puts hell on you, God wants you to feel hell, God wants hell for you. When you switch the words suffering for hell, it is clearer and easier to believe that what God wants us to get out of pain and suffering is...growth and understanding. To learn.
For the past few months God's themes for me were: Death and abuse.
These are two experiences that I couldn't hide from if I tried. It seems as though every person I meet has just lost somebody or they soon will. Many people have opened up to me about being abused as a child. Those people, as well as, the people in my past who have had the same experiences, have been echoing in my mind.
Today, the Jesus fish on the back of my truck, created a conversation between me and an older man, whom I've been spending time with lately. We began talking about the differences in types of churches and why we do or don't like them very much. It lead us into a conversation about judgement. How some churches will throw the bible at your face and some will welcome you with a kind heart and be open-minded. This lead into talking about people in general, he immediately jumped to homosexuals. He knew I was "gay." He began to say that he had a hard time with homosexuality for a long time. He simply and freely opened up to me and told me that he was abused by a gay man when he was only five years old. That issue affected him then, and still affects him today. It was one reason why he hated gay people and couldn't see them as anything but gay. I could understand why he would feel so much hatred towards them. The type of life suffering that comes from abuse I can't relate to, but I know it's one of the worse experiences to go through. It wasn't until he got into his business as a public health official when his mind was finally opened and his heart was lightened. He also had a friend whom was gay. It wasn't until he started asking his friend about being gay, that he finally felt freedom from the hatred he felt towards gay people. He asked everything he could; how it started, when did he know, etc. Whatever he needed to ask to feel better settled. This friend of his was a great guy, he loved the guy, and couldn't understand why his friend was different from the gay stereotype he had created because of his pain. Since then, he's been open to gay people. He doesn't see them as "gay," but as Natalie, as Jesse, as people. He had the same issue with Black people. He was raised to believe that they were terrible people because of their skin color. While he learned not to judge people for their sexuality, he LEARNED not to judge people by their skin color either.
The past week has been difficult with a friend's family of mine. I no longer see the surface of the relationships that make them one. My friend showed me the leaves, then the branches, then the stump, and now the roots. They are deep. Not only deep, but still digging through the surface of the dirt. The roots are beginning to strangle the other limbs of the tree. How we both wish things could be simple, easily fixed, to just change. Why does it always have to be this way? Will it always be this way? Why, God, are you doing this? Change hearts, move feet, open mouths! I'm doing my part, why can't you do yours? It's in YOUR hands, after all.
There are many lessons in life that I know. I know them down to a T. I know that stealing is bad. I know that murder is wrong. I know that God allows pain for us to grow and change, but I needed to hear it again. I needed to relearn the thing I've already learnt. So do all of the people who are currently on my mind. We need to remember that pain sucks, we can even say it sucks, it should. We also need to remember that God is good. He has the best intentions. He is the only person in the world who can get that right! So the next time you are hurting or sad, just remember that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and within the tunnel, God is going to transform you heart in ways you would never be able to do on your own, or in a perfect society. He is preparing us for heaven.
God says, here...here is hell, look at it, feel it, revel in it, believe in it, hurt in it, suffer in it, so you can see that I am good, that I love you and that I plan to heal you. It will all work out...in the end. Will you still be with me? Or will you believe the lies that hell has to offer?
These things had to come FIRST.
Be strong, the Lord is with you.
If you think of this world as a place intended simply for our happiness, you find it quite intolerable: think of it as a place of training and corrections and it's not so bad. - C.S. Lewis (God in the Dock)
