I'm Winging It

We all have different things we look for in a friend. We all have different friends.
So how do you know if you're being a good friend? There are obvious characteristics of friends you don't tend to look for. An example would be people who like to lie or get into a lot of trouble. Friends that you've watched backstab other people, etc.

But for the friends you do love very much, how do you know you're being a great friend or if there are areas you need to change? Usually, my friends will tell me where I'm lacking or the areas they need me that I may not be noticing they need my help in. Yet, sometimes friends don't tell you anything for a fear they may be the problem instead or that they shouldn't expect so much from you. It could just be that they have a hard time communicating.

Yet, what about someone new that you meet? Should you add them as a friend on fbk or wait till you meet again? Do you ask to hang out one on one or as a group? How do you know when asking questions is too much or not enough? Do you wait for them to initiate or do you? Then when you have your first disagreement do you keep your comments to yourself or speak your mind? Because if you disagree, they may not want to be your friend "as much," but if you just keep your mouth shut, you're safe. When is a joke too much?

A friend is so many things and cannot be defined by anyone but YOU. We all have different needs and we look for different people. I just hate the fact that we have to monitor our feelings or thoughts depending on certain people, our insecurities and our fears of losing them as friends or losing them as new friends. Is there an answer to this question? or do we just wing it?