When I went to California this summer, I took a few *new* pictures of my father. Pictures of him smoking and the way I see it. My sister commented on them and said, "eew, gross." If she doesn't want to see the light in that darkness then that's fine. I know that I live a happier, more peaceful life, realizing what Lady Gaga said:
"If you don't have shadows, you're not standing in the light"
Through the years I've forgotten all the traumatic things that have happened in our lives, all of your failures as a father and all of the times I cried or couldn't cry from being so numb. Now, all I see is a man that I love unconditionally, a man I'm related to, a man that's just like me. A man who is me.
I love you daddy.
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